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Friday 30 November 2012

The Moment Has Flown

A smile that warmly welcomes
But a hand that is just out of reach
A touch that can never be realised
From the skin that’s as soft as a peach
Heart which loves but cannot be loved
Insightful mind with so much to teach
A beauty that lights up each waking hour
But the love that is just out of reach

Coming back to my world you engaged me
Thrilled me with tales of your life
All the things you achieved when we parted
Triumphs and heart wrenching strife
How you overcame pain and succeeded
Forged existence in your new paradise
But remember the day that it started
The day you ran from being my wife

Since you returned I have wondered
Would we ever rekindle that spark
Are memories blinkered by the passage of time?
Is my desire so wide of the mark?
But that moment has long since departed
Like a thief in the night, stole away in the dark
And the moments I cherish are memories
Of the heart I once craved and want back

Two lives which were once intertwined
Took paths and adventures alone
The day that you left, left me empty
Till the partner I found made our home
And now you fire up all those feelings
So raw that I’m chilled to the bone
I drift back to the life that I now have
For that moment, for now, it has flown

© Fergus Martin
2012

Thursday 29 November 2012

The Truth That Haunts


I journeyed a route I chose selfishly sure
Abandoning futures through the actions I took
Left behind those I once loved but returning once more
The road that I chose turned full circle through fate
And I return to the start of my life’s great detour

Starting over down another freshly mown path
Insecurities come back to haunt my every dream
Failings of the past once more sharpen into focus
The fear of betrayal rises ever closer to the surface
Nervously await the arrival of abandoned wrath

Turning my back on the carnage I created
You, the only soul that ever knew the sordid truth
The reality of my leaving and the chaos I left behind
Knowing I left to protect the lives of the innocent
Acts I committed left you torn and alienated

Returning to the scene of my shallow selfish crime
I find myself wandering through painful memories
Fate dealt out it’s criminally twisted hand
A moment I had never perceived way back then
Being here again, is like going back in time

A dark secret to your chest you hold so close
Awaiting the day you can lay the victims table
Setting out the cellars of insecurity and failing
Of a simple and once deceitful twisted wretch
Await the moment for the truth to be exposed

Avoiding you becomes tougher with every passing day
Ever decreasing circles we swim in intertwine
The crossroads of two paths must come together soon
Colliding in the carnage of those forgotten memories
And I stare in trepidation at the moment in disarray

© Fergus Martin
2012

Wednesday 28 November 2012

Dark Feast

Shadow in the night glides effortlessly
Through deserted fog laden streets
Silently drifting over cobblestones
Searching the bodies so frail and so weak

From boats in the harbour came the vengeance
Down alleys rutted rock hard in the ice
Past shuttered windows, barred and secured
Seeking the souls to be forfeit this night

Spreading the message of fear and foreboding
Sliding through doorways silent and sure
Ripping apart the lives of the chosen
Craving the death of the weak and the poor

Infested hovels of hell ripe for the taking
Squalor and filth abound in the structures
Crammed into shells of miserable living
Carrion creatures perch waiting in gutters

Rampaging torrent of pestilent storm
Devouring with pleasure taking life as it pleased
Festering pits of disease ridden corpses
Black raven of death swept the city with ease

© Fergus Martin
2012

Tuesday 27 November 2012

Suzie Smiled

Fourteen feet rampaging through the house
Through three tiny rooms
And a postcard garden
At the sound of her voice, as quiet as a mouse
Suzie smiled

Seven pairs of hands, each helping out
In her tiny space
No father around
And never was there a scream or a shout
Suzie smiled

Seven mouths left to fend for themselves
No one to tend to
In this quiet house
No tears to wipe and no trousers to mend
Suzie smiled

Taking on the weak and abandoned
Mother to them all
The empty little house
Echoed once more to the sound of the rampant
Suzie smiled

Sixty feet came rampaging from the seven mouths
Mixing with the new
All coming together
In a house where a mothers love knows no bounds
Suzie smiled

Sprawling tribe expanding over years and through time
Lived to love
And loved to forgive
Holding firmly to each other in life’s pantomime
Suzie smiled

Through hardship and struggles they came together
A unified front
In a divided world
Punch their weight in unison whatever the weather
Suzie smiled

Standing together again in this tiny white room
United as one
Holding each other
As she breathed her last breathe through the doom and the gloom
Suzie smiled

© Fergus Martin
2012

Monday 26 November 2012

Tale Of The Trick

Walking away from the meadow of wells
Up to the bridge on the hill
Watching the salmon at play in the river so wide
Upstream to the rich spawning pools
Looking out over rich countryside,
the bubbling stream,
Spies all the others walking his way
Look there
Everyone looked so strange to me

They got their macs and they got their sticks
Looking around for the steam train
Blokes called Dave on the riverbank
Stand around in the clear rain, I cried

And wept as they searched for the berries of red
Annual pilgrims in Blair
Never believing train and station long gone
Along with the era of steam
Soon they were talking again
Old weaving mills?
More like some stones and a pile of wood
Oh
No

They got their macs and they got their sticks
Looking around for the steam train
Blokes called Dave on the riverbank
Stand around in the clear rain, I cried

And stormed down the hill, straight at the throng
I grabbed one Dave by the scruff of the neck, pointing out
There, beyond the hills in wild anticipation
Lie the mountain ranges, and the train puffing proud
Let me take you there, and show you the living beauty
I will show you sights you won’t forget
What a place to be

They got their macs and they got their sticks
Looking around for the steam train
Blokes called Dave on the riverbank
Stand around in the clear rain, I cried
And laughed

So we left town in search of the mystery train
And an era of steam that’s long gone
Up through the forest climbing into the hills
Gazed over lush valleys and I pointed out
They looked in the distance and maybe they saw
A quick puff of steam - only Scotch mist you fools
And I was gone and my voice rang out

You got your macs and you got your sticks
You don’t even know where the path is
Hope you get lost in the Pass of The Dead
That lies in the far distance

Goodbye Dave, ramble on

© Fergus Martin
2012

Tower Of Strength




Under the damp mist
Surveying all that is around
Waiting through time
Protecting
Sheltering
Providing safety for all
A welcome sight
A protector
Standing tall
Erect
A heart of purity
And a shield of hope
In the wilderness of the world

Solid as the rock that supports
The walls that offer
Sanctuary
In the fields of chaos
From the mayhem that surrounds
From an ever threatening world
From life itself
Sanctuary
In a welcome harbour
Safe
From the reality which surrounds
Safe
In the heart of the protector

Safe
Under the welcome shelter
Shielded
From the storms of the world
As they rage in ignorance
And betrayal
Welcome haven stands
A tower of strength
Renewed with each battle
Empowered with each conflict
Safe
Secure
Sanctuary

© Fergus Martin
2012


Sunday 25 November 2012

Winter Blossom

Treetops glisten with the sprinklings of fairy dust
As breath of winter falls upon the frosted fields
Flowing rivers becalmed as winter overpowers them
Crystal covered gardens flower with blossom white.

A silken carpet underfoot, undisturbed a winter blanket
Melting to the touch create an atmosphere of calm
Muffled sounds of winter creep slowly through the air
Welcome greeting cards in every field and garden

How such gently falling flowers
So delicate, pristine and pure
Can with such calm, persuasive, strength
Force a halt on all that moves around

Carpet lying there becomes a barrier to climb
Carefully crafted layers unite with strength imbued
Momentary joy at the wisp of wonderment
Turns in time to thoughts of menace and foreboding

Grinding to a halt the machinations of humanity
With such ease they slide and drift and hold
Blocking arteries with ease it leaves us stranded
Breeds inane bewilderment at the chaos that ensues

How these gently falling blossoms
Pure and frosted pallor to the eye
Can halt the wheels of industry
With such a gentle touch

© F Martin
2012

Saturday 24 November 2012

The Traveller

Tired is the traveller, tired of the detours,
the diversions.
Endless directional changes
for no apparent reason.
Tired of returning to the
same
lonely
point in the road,
The same fork, forever leading back
to the same
lonely
spot.

That singular moment in time
when the paths led somewhere,
but not now.
Roads that lead to nowhere
once promised rainbows at their end.
But the opportunity to choose
was lost
And dissipates slowly with
each beat of the heart,
each sweep of the hand
on its circular path
a constant reminder that the traveller is
no
further
forward.

Constantly searching for
a new path
a new way
a new life.

Truth arrives at its destination unexpectedly.

“This life that you chose,
that you travelled,
that you maintained;
is of your making.
Yours alone,
through your decisions
This is what you are,
this is what you made.
The journey begins now.”

© Fergus Martin
2012

Friday 23 November 2012

Above and Below

Above

Approaching the planet they cut power and drifted
Falling slowly through the thin atmosphere
Excitement abounded amongst they crew
As they trembled in anticipation and fear
Fear of the unknown and what they would find
Anticipation of being the first to arrive
Proud that they’d set foundations for empire
A future in space that would sprout and survive

Initial vibrations calm and raise the mood to euphoria
Months in the planning to get to this moment of joy
All systems checked they can relax for a short time
Rejuvenate and consolidate bask in their glory, enjoy
Many tasks lie ahead before they can begin the construction
A new life in the stars for their people, educated and wise
Launch of the lander, on a mission to sample, test and decide
Scanning the surface, movement catches the eyes

Scanning, re-scanning, metallic eye roams the cratered vista
Was there really a movement out there or just a trick of the light
Pausing the lander’s path, they are convinced that they saw
Shadowy figures on the horizon as the stars shine so bright
Confusion reigns with the relisation the mission could be lost
On this solitary rock, where they believed life was dead
Unarmed, defenceless against inhabitants aggression
Quietly, subtly, the voices begin to cry out inside their heads

Panic, sheer uncontrolled panic spreads throughout the visitors
“Is this the end of their dream, their mission, their very existence/”
Slowly, surely, clarity comes with the thought, one of welcome
Of peace, and of fear of just what the visitor’s intent is
Realisation that communication can be achieved 
Leads to compromise, the reality that the planet is alive
Frantic urgent pleading leads to the only real solution
“Leave now and prove that we are worthy and wise!”

Below

As they watched from the dust covered surface
The object descended slowly through space
Expressionless eyes gazed upwards in wonder and fear
Watching the shape fall from the night without pace
Flickering thoughts passed from one mind to another
Anxiety reigned sentient in the lives underground
Fear of this thing on their planet unwelcomed
Their future survival at threat as the shape touches down

They watched in silence as the strange craft lay so silent
Dust settling down on the surface, they wait for some sign
A flickering, a movement, an indication of what may occur
Nervous palpations echo through receptive linked minds
Watching as the silence returns calm to planetary surface
Waiting, ever silent, without movement, silent surveillance
Whilst underground dwellers twist nervously in anticipation
And then the object is ejected from the bowels of deliverance

Watching, ever watching, as the object moves around the dusted rocks
Stopping suddenly, they freeze, fearing detection in every sinew
Time passes all too slowly as they realise they have been discovered
Horrifically and swiftly, messages from one mind to the colony flew
“Still, be still, wait, do nothing, we cannot be sure, we must hope”
Confusion flies and catches fire amongst the peaceful habitat
They are no fighters, but finally a message to all is delivered
One planetary thought strikes out soulful and vibrant

Panic, sheer uncontrolled panic spreads throughout the colony
“Is this the end of their race, their planet, their very existence?”
Slowly their though permeates the mind of the unwelcomed visitors
“Welcome, peace, we are here, you have no need to fear us
Slowly thoughts ricochet back and understanding becomes reality
First contact with another race, the visitors from above respond
An answer that is welcome comes from the those not like them
“We will leave you now, we return to where we came from”

© Fergus Martin
2012

Thursday 22 November 2012

Always

If I could go back then, I would
If I could have that time over I would
If I could be with you again, I would
You gave me the love that I needed
You shone the light on my life
I loved you then and always will

Every day I think of you
Of how you were and what you’d do
To keep us safe, warm and secure
I loved you then and always will

If I could have known you better, I would
If I could have made you stay, I would
If I could have changed your ways, I would
But you gave me the strength I needed
Made me the person I grew into
I loved you then and always will

Every day I think of you
Of how you were and what you’d do
To keep us safe, warm and secure
I loved you then and always will

When I needed you most you were gone
Left on the wind with your ill’s
No shoulder then to support me
No wisdom now to guide me
And for all of your troubles and problems
I loved you then, and always will

Today is the day I miss you most
And tears flood uncontrolled every hour
My feelings for you are a bittersweet pill
But, I loved you before, and I always will

© Fergus Martin
2012

The Woodturner’s Big Day

So many things could be said about you
Bout your chainsaw and man-hut and all
Of the way that you always think not of yourself
But see the good in the folks one and all

Leaving your home as a young man
Travelling south to seek fortune and fame
Finding wood and a welcome so heartfelt
And the apple that kicks in the brain

A kite-boarding legend at ease in his suit
With real ale in your hand you’re at home
Chopping trees with your saw when they fall
A craftsman who’s times never his own

Off to his hut goes the man from the north
As she thinks of hotels with champagne
And walking on cliffs on the southerly coast
In the sunset became strong once again

And so from the lady that comes from the south
To the jester that fills up her life
Here’s to another great birthday you imp
So glad that you made me your wife

© Fergus Martin
2012

Wednesday 21 November 2012

What I Am

Looking back on a sea of dreams
Summer walks on the sandy shore
When we strolled through life without a care
And we wanted more
So much more

And the memory lives on
Merging with the others
With all the things I’ve done
Becoming what I am

Walking out on a winters day
Footfall dragging on the frozen ground
Leave behind the sweetest time I have known
With not a sound
Not a single sound

And the memory lives on
Merging with the others
With all the things I’ve done
Becoming what I am

Striding out on the solo trail
Single steps on the lonely road
Moving forward on the path that I chose
Leaving on my own
No one home

And the memory lives on
Merging with the others
With all the things I’ve done
Becoming what I am

On the path decisions made
Have been the ones made selfishly
Forks in the broken road taken by chance
Letting me be free
Set me free

And the memories live on
Merge with all the others
With all the things I’ve done
Becoming what I am

What I am
Is the sum of what I’ve been
The total of my choices
The culmination of my dreams
All those memories that I keep,
Linger deep within my psyche
Brought me here, 
Sure and prepared
That sum of all I was,
Becoming what I am

© Fergus Martin
2012

Tuesday 20 November 2012

Four A.M.

The daily routine
Revolves around one precious moment
That single fleeting opportunity in a mundane life
Which eased the never ending torment

A working week
Filled with hope in some far flung lands
Far too long have we travelled this highway
Two journeys split by the festering world’s demands

Fridays nights
Welcomed with unrecognisable sobriety
Best behavior guaranteed for this single opportunity
Of hope, peace comfort and clarity

Four A.M.
Clock ticking ever closer to the hour
That your voice will be ringing in my ear
And I will once again succumb to your power

Four A.M.
The weekly ritual
Awake for this moment
Time to make the call

Four A.M.
The hour that will be remembered for a lifetime
The hour that forever stopped the endless separation
The hour that you finally become mine.

© Fergus Martin
2012

Monday 19 November 2012

Mistress of The Mind


She is a cruel mistress
Leaving me drained whenever she makes her prescence felt
Constantly
Whirring my mind in perpetual motion never ceasing
Exhausted, I fight back

She is a hard taskmaster
Working me to the brink of desperate measures
Unsympathetically
Throwing my mind into eternal hell and damnation
Exhausted, I fight back

She is a vicious demon
Drawing every ounce of energy from my body as I lie still
Hungrily
Sapping my body in her energetic throws of the die
Exhausted, I fight back

She is my glorious nemesis
Defeating me at every twist and turn on the battlefield of dreams
Shamelessly
Scything me down with her every movement and decision
Exhausted, I fight back

She is the slavedriver of my soul
Whipping my feeble sensibilities to distraction
Mercilessly
Shredding my soul with every passing moment on the dial
Exhausted, I fight back

She is the carrion of dreams
Destroying every thought with her mere existence
Relentlessly
Picking away at the fibre of my very being with disdain
Exhausted, I fight back

She is the spawn of Satan’s nightmare
Devil horned she twists and turns me round and round
Persistently
Sets burning coals alight within my tortured mind
Exhausted, I fight back

She is a welcome lover
When finally she takes me in her feathered arms
Wantonly
Draws me deep into a realm of blissful calm
Asleep, the fight is over
For now.

© Fergus Martin
2012

Sunday 18 November 2012

Brothers and Lovers

How do I make you understand the way I feel,
the way I love the many lovers that I call my own.
Do not judge me on my morality, the legality,
but judge me on the person that I am. 
Do I love? 
Do I care?
Do I express my feelings to others? 
Is this what you do not understand,
cannot comprehend, cannot appreciate? 
That in your terms, I am a bigamist, a polygamist, a cheat, unnatural, a deceiver.
I am none of these things,
I merely live my life differently to you.
I have a different sensual perception than you,
I have different views on what love is,
how love can be shared, who we can love,
how many people I can love, be in love with
and in what way I show my love.


Is this not the beauty of the world? 
It’s ever growing maturity,
it’s increasing acceptance of others, 
it’s understanding,
it’s multi-cultural acceptance? 
Then why do you remain stuck  in the stagnant pond of the behemoth of monogamy and ridicule. 
Why can you not accept me for the person that stands before you? 
Why does your
self-centered righteousness stand in the way of you seeing the person. 
Your intransigent beliefs deny you the brotherhood.
And all I crave from you is understanding.

I accept your failings.
I accept your misconceptions about my way of life.
Why, oh why can you not accept a person for what they are,
but judge their every action based on your own
monogomistic cultural indoctrination.

Why do you believe I am so different from you? 
We differ only in this one little thing, little brother.
Love.

© Fergus Martin
2012